


When You Lost It

by jadesshadow01



Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Breaking the Fourth Wall, F/F, F/M, Gen, I didn't think this would happen, M/M, Multi, The story you didn't know you needed, will add more as they come - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-19
Updated: 2018-09-18
Packaged: 2019-07-14 04:19:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,376
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16032851
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jadesshadow01/pseuds/jadesshadow01
Summary: Steve Rogers couldn’t understand the sight that as before him. He knew Bucky had taken over as Captain America for a little bit, giving him a chance to recuperate from the many years that he had been fighting and the toll that it seemed to be doing. He, also, knew that the avengers had been expanding over time, but this? This was insane.Bucky Barnes was getting tired of the same old game. Fight the bad guy, smile for the camera, and put on the suit that his best friend had handed to him. Check for a message from him every night. See if the world was ending on the news. Try to fight back memories that threatened to take over his mind. That was until a new soldier walked in to Stark tower, offering him a way out of the repetiveness that was his life, and offering a new perspective on what it means to be a hero.Wade Wilson was just your average run of the mill superhero-Really? That’s the introduction I get?Sit down, Deadpool, this is my story.But technically, it’s my story.I-I have no response to that. Let’s just get to the story.Oooh, where I bend Cap over and-You hush your mouth, or there won’t be any bending cap over. On with the story.





	When You Lost It

**Author's Note:**

> So I have been on a slight Hiatus on everything while trying to get my novels done. I don't know if I'll have a set schedule for this one, but i do know that I am working on it and the others. If it takes me a minute to get it posted, don't be discouraged. I appreciate all comments.

** Chapter One **

****

                Steve Rogers stared at the can of beans that he was supposed to be cooking for a long time. Truthfully, he was getting tired of eating the same thing every day, but he wasn’t going to complain. That was Natasha’s way of trying to force him out of the self isolation that he had put himself in. Not that it was working, of course. The echoing pain of the things he had to do to save his country lingered in a part of him that woke him screaming every night, forced him to purchase a new mattress every week.

                Technically, he had won the war. The battle over Bucky’s rights was a blow to the Avenger’s that was only healed by the agreement that Steve let him go to Wakanda and get aid. Not that he had much of a choice when Bucky himself told him to let him go, forcing him to once again watch as the man he had come to admire put himself to sleep to escape the memories that threaten to tear his foundation apart. Even then, Steve couldn’t go home to mourn the loss of his best friend. No, he was forced to watch and wait as the others tried to get some semblance of rights for the mutants that lingered in the shadows, not wanting to the live the life that Steve had chosen, and regretted.

                It took hours of talking to Tony Stark and his comrades for them to see the danger, and only because Tony had started taking care of some kid who was calling himself Spiderman. Good Kid, but wouldn’t be able to hide his identity if the Sokovia Accord went in to effect. Actually, Spiderman being videoed during the battle and having questions raised about his identity is what triggered Stark to stop it before they managed to get any information on Stark’s pet project. Steve felt himself snort as the image of a baby Spiderman hanging on Tony Starks suit flittered through his mind.

                And with the fall of the Sokovia Accords, the others had managed to gain their freedom, getting the rights to go back home and see the families they had left behind. Not that Steve left Wakanda. No, he didn’t have a home to go back to. He just had a fractured relationship with the son of the man his best friend killed, a team that was falling apart, and a best friend that was frozen while they tried desperately to deprogram him.

                So when the call for all Avengers to Assemble, he was surprised to see them blowing up his phone, staring at it for several hours as he sat in Bucky’s “room”, trying to gather his thoughts in the dark of the night. It wasn’t the until the burner phone that only had one number on it rang that Steve finally gave in, leaving Wakanda to take up the mantel as Captain America and save the world once again.

                Then life went on. It never really went back to normal. It just went on. Steve was swamped in the Captain America stuff that he didn’t have as much time to go back to Wakanda, something that was bothering him, but made the Black Panther breath a little easier. Tony Stark was cordial, letting him stay in the Avenger’s tower, but never discussing the information that was found out about his parents, never letting Steve close enough to truly apologize for the events that occurred.

                Time really did move on. Bucky woke, and Steve came to see him. Steve left to go back to the Avenger’s tower after a week so that they could begin the treatment for the PTSD that Bucky had obviously gained. He couldn’t be there. He was a trigger. Not that Steve complained about it. He knew there were going to be some ups and downs. He knew there was going to be some issues that couldn’t be solved by forcing his way in to a situation. That did not mean that he had to like it.

                And after about a year and a half passed, The Winter Soldier joined the Avengers. Tony Stark and Bucky Barnes had been forced to have conversations about the incident by their therapist, making it possible for them to face each other without the absolute fear that Stark would kill Bucky in a rage of vengeance. It was close though. They somehow managed to reconcile, becoming closer than Steve and Tony were. That might have been the tipping point. No one actually knows what the tipping point was at all.

                They had managed to go out on a relatively small mission. It was more for the show that the Avengers were finally all back together. They had managed to get the job done, in a relatively short amount of time. He can’t remember, but he thinks someone told him it had only been an hour for them to complete task. He stirred the beans that had managed to get in to the pot.

                No, it was after the assignment when he lost it. It was standing in the interrogation room, with the team watching as the man in front of him rubbing in the past that Steve had too much time to think about that he snapped. He couldn’t even tell you what he said, just that one moment he was fine and the next he was on top of  the man, slamming his fist in to his face as hard as possible. It had taken Bucky’s strength and Natasha’s words to calm him down enough that he pulled away, staring in horror at the bloody mess that he had left.

                He remembered marching out the room. Sam was trying to calm him down, trying to sooth whatever had finally snapped in him, but he couldn’t do it anymore. He could see the faces of the others as they stared at him, their jaws dropped in amazement, fear flashing in the face of Stark as Steve finally turned away, walking out.

                No one stopped him. No one stopped him from going to his room, packing his bag, and marching out to the common area. It wasn’t until he laid the shield in front of Bucky that there was any protest from the group, and it was only from two of the members. He didn’t belong here. He wasn’t welcome anymore. His hunt to stop the past had stopped him from being the person he used to be. And he was tired. So tired.

                So he said nothing else as he walked down to the garage, climbed on the bike, and drove away. The protests that Bucky and Sam echoed through the room still echoing in the back of his mind, but the screams that had been added over the years drowned them out. He needed a moment. He needed away.

                That’s why he was here, in a cabin as far from human contact as he could get. Something that would stop the screams, that would calm down the anxiety that had built from the moment that he had woken to a new world. He was pretty sure the Avengers knew where he was, but they weren’t going to come get him. Not unless something major happened. Something that required that the original Captain take his role once again.

                And as he stirred his beans, the screams started to take over once more, leaving the desolate feeling echoing through him. He was done.

 

                ******************************************************************

                Bucky stared at Natasha as she walked in the room from her vacation, taking in the empty food bag that she had brought back with her. She wasn’t going camping like she said, everyone knew that. She was dropping off food for their missing member. Trying to take care of the man that had walked away over a year ago in a fit that they had never seen before. Natasha gave him a soft smile, knowing what was coming next. It was routine at this point, a way to soothe his ragged nerves.

                “Is he alright?” Bucky let the words fall from his lips, watching as the smile tightened before she sighed.

                “He’s alive,” and that meant more than he could explain. No one could tell where his mental state was. They could only guess based on a moment of terror and his need to get away. He nodded as Tony came strolling in the room, staring at Natasha’s tight smile and Bucky’s bowed head.

                “Hm,” was the only thing that Tony said, watching as Bucky turned back to his bowl of mixed fruit, stabbing it prejudicely, “Did no one cook dinner?”

                Bucky rolled his eyes, watching as Tony forcefully pulled the fridge open. It had taken some time to get the others on their side on the Steve situation. Sam and Bucky ripping them a new one about the timeline that had occurred, how they had pushed their favorite Captain to the edge, and wondered why he was free falling. That didn’t mean there wasn’t any tension over the subject, but it was finally starting to calm. The pain of the abandonment was finally starting to be less sharp, more like a dull ache that rested in everyone.

                “You’re going to have to cook your own food,” Natasha drawled, watching as Tony gave her an insulted look, hand resting on his chest. Bucky gave a huff of a laugh as Tony stared in the fridge.

                “Friday,” He said casually, “Order some Chinese from the place. You know which one.”

                “Got it, Boss,” the voice echoed happily around them.  Bucky tuned the rest out, staring at his fruit with a sad smile.

                “So,” Tony drawled out after several moments, “It’s been a year.”

                “It’s not permanent,” Bucky muttered, glancing up to see Tony sitting across from him.

                “He’s not coming back,” Tony sighed as he glanced at the woman sitting tense at the end of the table, “’Maybe it’s time to announce you as the permanent Captain America.”

                “He’s coming back,” Bucky snapped, rolling his shoulders as the whir of his metal arm echoed through the room, “He just needs some time.”

                “We’ve given him time,” Tony shouted as Bucky glared openly at him, “He’s not coming back. And even if he does, I’m not sure that we want him to be the Captain. We don’t know his state of mind.”

                Natasha came over, resting her hand on Bucky’s shoulder, “We need to-“

                “We need to stop thinking that he’s saveable,” Tony snapped as Bucky stood, Natasha’s hand sliding to his lower back.

                “I’m pretty sure that’s what people were saying about The Hulk, Iron Man and Me.” Tony’s mouth opened prepared for the argument that seemed to never end.

                “Boss-“

                “Not now, FRIDAY,” Tony snapped as he pointed a finger at Bucky, “We sought for help! We looked to get ourselves out of the situation that we were in. He just kept making it worse.”

                “By what?” Bucky snapped, as he met Tony’s eyes, “Trying to help us before he helped himself? By putting the world before his own sanity.”

                “You’re just saying that because-“

                “Boss-“ Fridays impatient voice broke in, as Tony waved a hand in the air.

                “Not now Friday,” He snapped again, “He had plenty of time to get help while he was in Wakanda. He had plenty of time to get help while here and waiting for you to get better. You just don’t want to admit that he’s not the man that he used to be. He’s just the left overs of the Captain we used to worship.”

                “Well,” A new voice stated as the other three turned, facing the man who stood in the opening of the Kitchen and living room. The black and red outfit covered him from head to toe, not giving them any view on who might be visiting them. “This was an interesting conversation to walk in on.”

                “Who are you?” Natasha asked, pulling a knife from somewhere, no one really asked where the woman hid all her weapons, just knew they were always there.

                “Oh,” a small giggle fell from the lips as a hand went up to cover where they should have been, “I’m sorry! I’m Deadpool! I have been waiting so long to meet you!”

                “Well, Deadpool,” Bucky said, slowly, watching as the man happily jumped up and down muttering something about how the Winter Soldier said his name, “Why are you are here? Are you looking for help from the Avengers?”

                “Actually,” He drawled, walking over to the chair that was abandoned by Natasha merely minutes ago, “I’m here to help you.”

                “We don’t need your help,” Tony drawled as Deadpool blinked at him.

                “I think you do. The author of this fan fiction said you would need my help,” Deadpool said happily, as the other blinked at him.

                “What would we need your help with?” Deadpool smiled at Bucky, leaning on the table.

                “It’s actually about what you’re talking about,” Deadpool drawled as he began drawing things on the table, “I’ve been hired to take a hit out on Captain America.”

                Bucky went tense, his arm whirring as he began to prepare for battle. The eyes on the mask grew big, an almost odd wonder playing in them, “Before I finish the story, that is beyond cool. But I took the hit to get warning to you. I managed to kill the men who asked me to take the hit, but it’s bigger than just them. And they’re not looking for you, Winter Soldier.”

                The whirr of the arm died down, all eyes on the man in front of them. Natasha glanced at the other two, before taking the chair closest to him, resting a hand on his drawing hand. Deadpool went fully still, meeting her eyes as she smiled at him.     

                “Why don’t you  tell us everything you know?” She drawled out, watching as Deadpool blinked several times.

                “I think I just orgasmed,” He muttered as he rubbed a hand over his face, “That’s insanely unfair.” Natasha just blinked as he took another deep breath.

                “Alright,” He sighed as he glanced around the group, “Three men hired me to take a hit on Captain America. Steve Rogers. I, only, agreed to take the hit to figure out what was going on. They didn’t want any information, they didn’t want me to leave his body where he could find it. That’s not my normal. They asked that I bring the body back to a lab, or rather it was just an address and I went and looked to see what it was. I didn’t think that was a good idea, so I killed them on the second meeting, but I’m not the only hitman out there. They’re going to try to get someone to take out Captain America. And do something to him.”

                “Hydra,” Bucky muttered as he looked over at Tony’s panicked face, “I thought we were done with this shit.”

                “The author needed a plausible reason to drag Steve back to the tower kicking and screaming,” Deadpool announced, gaining more incredulous looks.

                “Why not take the hit?” Natasha asked as Deadpools mask got misty, again.

                “I should not be orgasming this much,” He muttered as he sighed, “Look, Captain America was the ultimate hero.” The room went absolutely still, all eyes on Deadpool. “He may not recognize me, but he helped me in a fight. He didn’t turn away when he saw me killing people, just helped me. Got me out of the situation I was in. Then called me a hero.” Deadpool paused watching as the other blinked. “I’m not a hero. I’m not half of what he is, but if I could help keep the real heroes going, then I will.”

                There was silence for several moment as the group gathered their thoughts. Deadpool  stared at Natasha, trying to ignore the light rubbing that she had started on his hand. No one should be that hot and deadly. Puts a new meaning to death by orgasm.

                Bucky was the first to sigh, staring at the table for several moments, “I’m going to get him.”

                “I’m coming,” Deadpool called out as the man left the room, itching to follow mister Icyhot out the room, but not wanting the hand to stop rubbing.

                “Call the Avengers, Tony,” Natasha stated after several moments, watching as the man grimaced and waved a hand. “We’re going to need more than a couple of us to take care of this.”

                Deadpool whimpered as she pulled her hand away, keeping his eyes on her as she walked out of the room, also. There was silence between Tony and Deadpool for several moments as Tony stared at him.

                “How did you get in here?” Tony finally blurted out as he pulled out his cell phone and typing quickly.

                “I just asked FRIDAY to let me in,” Deadpool said happily, as he flittered out the room, “Need to listen to your AI more often. The author doesn’t like your attitude lately.”

                Tony was left staring at the empty space that Deadpool had been standing in. This was going to be one of those missions that was going to drive him mad. He knew it.

 

 

                “Are we there yet?” Deadpool called happily from the back of the helicarrier where Bucky had left him. He sighed as he glanced over at Sam’s smirking face. It was the third time in fifteen minutes, and there was another fifteen minutes before they reached the cabin that Steve had managed to find in the middle of the woods. Bucky had to give Steve credit. When that man wanted to hide, he found the most difficult places to get to.

                “No, We’re not,” Clint snapped from next to Deadpool, staring at the man with a frown.

                “I thought you were the fun one,” a noticeable pout came across the mask as Clint rolled his eyes and looked over at the woman across from him.

                “Why did we bring him again?” Clint asked as Natasha shrugged.

                “I trust him,” She stated simply as she glanced to the front of the Helicarrier. Bucky stared out the window feeling the eyes on him as he relaxed his body for the third time since the information came in that Steve might be in danger. “So what are we expecting when we get there? Do you know if they managed to get someone else to go after him?”

                Deadpool and Clint stared at the sultry tone that Natasha gave Deadpoool, a shiver falling down his spine, “This author is going to give me a complex. I’ve never come so much.” He coughed before crossing his legs and meeting her eyes.

                “I actually don’t know. There’s a possibility,” Deadpool shrugged, “we’ll just take them out when we get there. I’d assume though that there is someone there. The author doesn’t like to make life easy on any of her characters.” Then he paused, staring at the ceiling for a moment, “Alright, so they’re not her characters, but she’s still not nice.”

                Clint just stared at the man with a blank face before leaning back in the seat and staring at the ceiling, “I thought we weren’t going to have anymore crazies in the group.”

                “I caught you in the ceiling playing tag with a squirrel that I didn’t know we had a week ago,” Tony stated from the comm as he flew next to the plane, “You have no room to talk.”

                Sam could no longer hold back the laughter as the sight of the field next to Steve’s cabin came in to view. He glanced back to see Natasha’s nod, the descent down giving them a moment to gather thoughts before Bucky turned with a frown.

                “We go in,” Bucky began before sighing, “Grab Steve and get out. There are no arguments, and no complaints. If he fights you, fight back. We need to get him to safety at all costs.” The nod echoed through the room as Tony was overheard on the comms.

                “Does this mean I get to blast him once?” Deadpool giggled.

                “That’s not the kind of book she was looking for, but go right ahead,” the others blinked as Tony sighed.

                “Let’s go.”


End file.
